Those " Emo together session " , really , may not change anything . But it shows that , we still love our partners so much , how much they meant to us . It's more painful for a man to tear then to bleed . Maybe they will never understand . But from our perspective , you are the only one we need now , and forever . You are our strength , support and life . We may look like we don't care , uncaring , selfish etc . But deep down , deep within our hearts , we know one thing ,and that is we love you too much till we can't afford to lose you . We just hope one day you will understand , and be back by our side . Got a song lyrics , very very meaningful . It's in Chinese . Why do good songs always appears in Chinese ? Are we the superior race and language ? I don't mean anything , just a comment . I don't want the police at my door for racism . Song title - 希望 . Meaning " Hope " . I hope my translation is correct.
我一直以来生活在你身边
不懂你如何看得见
只好静静靠在一边
你的笑容能让我开心一整天
只要一天没和你见面
我的心情不会好一点
时间已经不多
我还有话很想说
已藏在我心里不懂如何开口
我们很快就要走
回忆也不算太多
简简单单希望你会懂
不能在一起也没关系
至少你懂我的心
会在想你
那些回忆会永远抱着甜蜜
不管未来你会在哪里
我都不会忘记
我爱你
你是我微笑的原因
只是希望你能比从前开心
Quote of the day
" If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you."
Tampines North CSC ? I wonder ...
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald
Quoted from Yuan Jie's blog "
It's never wrong to be a 'devoted lover'. But it becomes 'naive fool' when you kept waitin for their presence and they never appear to care and be there for you. You are just a naive fool waitin and guardin the love for them to prevent it from fadin. In fact, your face in their mind has slowly faded and never remembered by them . " I look at this post , and I wonder . Yeah , the truth hurts . He spoke without holding back . Can't blame him though . I think he had enough too . What he said is true . But i still love her . Why can't she understand . It's never easy to forget . I'm not as strong as some of you guys out there . Hate me all you wanted . Did a test .
| You Are Guinness |
You know beer well, and you'll only drink the best beers in the world.
Watered down beers disgust you, as do the people who drink them.
When you drink, you tend to become a bit of a know it all - especially about subjects you don't know well.
But your friends tolerate your drunken ways, because you introduce them to the best beers around. |
So , I'm a picky drinker . So what ? Anyway , I'm so confused with life now that I'm tired of everything . If you guys want to help me , don't scold me . Talking will be fine .
Quote of the day
" Lots of things change...lots of them don't...but the fact that I love you...that will always stay the same. "
Each night I taste , the purest of pain
Gerald
Naive fool or Devoted lover ? Good question ? Someone answer me please . By the way ,I'm having bad mood swings recently , so my friends , please bear with me . It might be over in awhile , but it might also not . Now , even typing my blog post I'm also having mood swings . What the fuck ? Damn . I really can't stand myself . Really , if the day that comes where i bid my last good bye , would i turn back and see a different world ? The day might just arrived sooner then anyone of you could ever imagined .
I did what my heart told me to . I hope , my heart is right this time .
Quote of the day
" Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die. "
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
Getting fitter and fitter everyday . At least if i died , i will die a fit man . Shooting has improved . That's a personal perspective . After so long out , i finally have the " feel " of shooting again . Watch out!!
Quote of the day
" Life is not measured by the number of breathes we take, but by the number of moments that take our breath away. "
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
| You Are 84% Brutally Honest |
The truth hurts, especially when it comes from you.
You don't mince words, and you probably take this result as a huge complement. |
So , honesty is the best policy ? I have my doubts . Why ? Because i always end up hurting the people i treasure most . I hate myself . I hate my personality . But what can i do ? Why don't God , you just bloody let me die ? At least i don't suffer all this shit that is going on right now . Take it easy ? Come on , of course you would put it this way . You are not the one suffering anyway . Fate ? Again , you bloody created it ! I can't fight fate you son of a bitch ! U created everything . So don't bloody blame on fate . If i tell you I'm going to end my life now , what are you going to say ? Fate ? Or my own decision ? Or you are going to come up with another stupid excuse ? I had enough ! Please , please , do what u bloody hell preach !
Quote of the day
" The trouble with life is that you're half-way through it before you realize it's a do-it-yourself thing. "
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
Did not go school today , don't feel like going . Guess i left Yuan Jie alone again . Sorry man . Went gym . Push myself . Feel the strain physically , lessen my pain emotionally . Glad to see my abs . It's getting better each day . Chest too . They really compliment each other well . Will be pushing myself again after school . The sky's the limit . Till the day my muscle strain , snap , i will keep doing it . At least it lets me feel better for a moment . Life for me now just keeps going in cycles . It's school , basketball , gym , work and home . I know , it's meaningless . I have lost my meaning of life anyway . Did a test . Guess the result ?
| Your Depression Level: 88% |
You seem to be severely depressed.
You should seek immediate attention from your physician.
Depression can be cured - you just need to take the first step. |
Guess I'm very depressed judging from the result . The 12% that went away , it's all thanks to gym and basketball . At least I'm not at the perfect score yet . Yuan jie and company , i really want to thank you guys for being there for me . No words to describe , But thanks a million . There's only so much you guys can do , let me do the rest myself .
Quote of the day
" When the going gets tough , the tough gets going. "
The lyrics for the song .
I'm sorry I didn't mean to call you
But I coudn't fight it
I guess I was weak and couldn't even hide it
And so I surrended just to hear your voice
I know how many times I said I'm gonna to live with out you
and maybe someone else is standing there beside you
But there is something baby that you need to know
That deep inside me i feel like Im dying
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking
Vida, give me back my fantasies,
The courage that I need to live
The air that I Breathe
Carino mio, my worlds become so empty
My day's are so cold and lonely,
and each night I taste
The purest of Pain
I wish I could tell you I'm feeling better every day
That it din't hurt me when you walked away
But to tell you the truth I can't find my way
And deep inside me I feel like I'm dying
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking
Vida, give me back my fantasies,
The courage that I need to live
The air that I Breathe
Carino mio, my worlds become so empty
My day's are so cold and lonely,
and each night I taste
The purest of Pain
I'm sorry I didn't mean to call you
But I coudn't fight it
I guess I was weak and couldn't even hide it
And so I surrended just to hear your voice
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
Make me a believer too.
Qoute of the day
"You may only be one person to the world, but you may also be the world to one
person."
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
I'm tired , stressed , confused and never happy . I'm lost . I'm afraid . I'm petrified . God , please . One wish , one dream . Once in my life , just one very important wish . God , it's going to be do or die for me . Please hear my prayers . I can't take it anymore . Destroying my confidence is never a good thing . You will never know what i will do to get it back .
Qoute of the day
" A spoon does not know the taste of soup, nor a learned fool the taste of wisdom. "
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
Was watching " Coach Carter " . I must say , it's quite inspiring ." It begins on the streets , it ends here " . How true is that ? Absolutely ! How about this ? " Average is just not good enough ! " . Way true dude ! If we are going to do something , average is definitely not enough . Which is why i may just join an outside team again . To complete a legacy which i never seriously undertook before . Well , not i never took it , i gave up half way . My name may strike fear in St George and Whampoa area , but i want more . Royce , i want you to remember my name . One day , i will be on par , if not better . No , i don't take you as an enemy . Just that i feel you are worth my time to compete with . Someone who can push me to my limits and beyond . It's really a pity you are in army . Before you ever step into the court and play again , you will see a better and stronger me . Away from basketball , life is still the norm for me . Still living life day by day . When will life ever improve ? And as Yuan Jie blog states , " Does god really exist ? " . It set me thinking . Why ? Because it seems that my prayers has never ever been answered before . I know you guys know what i mean . Well , i still have to move on , move on ...
Qoute of the day
" Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. "
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
Went school today , and guess what happen ? Was sent back home because my hair is too long . I was like " What the $%#@ !!! " . So , behold , my hair can be compared to any army regulars out there now . Was woke up in the morning but Christina . She scolded me for half hour on my responsibility , work attitude bla bla ~ ~ . She said i was slacking all the way , letting my mood affect my work , should be more mature in handling things . I was like whatever and told her that , " Shang liang bu zhen , xia liang wai " . Then she say i attitude problem . So whatever . Will be meeting her one day , and i am contemplating resignation . It's been on the back of my mind for quite sometime already , and to be fair to her , i don't have the mood to work either . Guess it's going to be my last month as a McDonald's Manager .Who cares ? It's just a name . I still work like a crew anyway . Went basketball after school , but damn , i was way off form . I can't help it . I don't have to mood to play . Sorry guys . I know i was the one who call you guys out but end up saying this . The call in the morning spoiled my mood for the entire day . Somehow , i wish i could turn back time , to the time where i was naive , and believed that everyone was honest and kind . Where promises were promises , and forever were forever . If only i could .
Qoute of the day
"To learn to succeed, you must first learn to fail."
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
Bball today , got beaten up in court . Damn , don't those guys know how to play bball ? Such a disgrace . They don't deserved to touch the ball or walk into the court . Call themsleves Basketballers , more like thugs to me . Get out of the court . I'll thrash you with one hand tied behind my back .
Qoute of the day
" If you love somebody, they shouldn't make you cry, they should be worth crying over. "
I feel those tears i cry are worth it.
Each night I taste , the purest of pain .
Gerald .
Well , can't get to sleep . Was watching " My sassy girl " and " Windstruck " . Damn , i really like them so . For those who don't know me well , and to reward those who view my blog , i'm a " Clam " . What does that mean ? Well , for those who knows me , you would have said that i can handle almost everything except , well , relationships . Now , that's my meaning of " Clam " . I'm hard on the outside , but , soft in the inside . And that explians why i have my fantasies of " Happily ever after " theory , and my love for this two movies . To be with your love ones is the happiest thing ever . I'm a die hard romance movie fan , but not all romantic movie can make me have that feeling . These two , brings it all out . Strongly recommended for romantic movies bluffs . I know , it's not me to admit that I'm such a guy , but who cares ? I am , and I'm proud to admit it . Guys have their soft spots too . Well , although romantic movies seems to be the minority and my theory isn't what most guys will be after . Nonetheless , i am . =) And guys , please don't come and mock me because of thhis confessions , or else , you know the rest .
Qoute of the day
" How come you can kill a deer and put it on your wall but it's illegal to keep them as a pet? "
我怎么能够说忘就能忘 , 你留下的一切 , 但我却怎么记不住你的容颜
| Your Ideal Relationship is Friends Only |
Honestly, you're not really ready for a relationship right now.
And you prefer to keep things platonic, for now.
That's not to say that one of your friends could be dating material.
You're just taking a break for now. |
SO GOD DAMN TRUE!!
我知道我会辛苦,
也会难过,
但我只想要你开心.
I'm sorry , but i can't stop being emo..
My heart has been broken like no other.
The breakage is severe... too severe already.
Each day is a struggle to wake up to reality,
The cold hard truth that sinks, but never really sinks in.
Courage to live on comes and goes...
Hope to move on betrays him time and time again.
I watch, helpless as i struggles in my brokeness
Like a dumb fool, a gaping idiot.
Useless me.
The pain translates and pierces the soul.
May a miracle heal my heart and soothe my pain.
May the pain slowly subside.
Joy, re-radiate from my countenance
Laughter, re-sound through my being
My shadow is the only one
that walks beside me.
My shallow heart
is the only thing that's beating.
Sometimes i wish someone out there
will find me
'til then i walk alone.
Even when you can't see me
I'lL be by your side..
I'lL LeT you know you are not alone..
Cause i love you and will never let you go..
_BROKEN DREAMS_
_A SHATTERED HEART_
_A LONELY SOUL_
Dedicated to terrence , yuan jie and all those who lost their loved ones through various reasons . I penned this poem down myself , it hit me after talking to you guys yesterday . It's been a long time since i ever wrote one , so pardon me if it sucks . And it has been named "Angels light"
Casted shadows in the night ,
Alone , down and not feeling right ,
Wishing for someone to hold us tight .
Tried as we might , It never seems bright .
Man can bleed , but never yield ,
They never understand how we feel .
Broken hearted , the pain is real .
That , our greatest fear .
For , to us , You are so dear .
Staring blankly up the skies ,
Praying for that single Sign ,
Untold , yet behold ,
The Angel's Light .
FUCK!! MY BASKETBALL SHOES!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!
I promise you with everything i have got , It will never be the same . Just that once , trust me one last time , like you always do . For i never lied to you , ever .
My heart hurts like fuck.
The reason ?
It's all because of you .
你曾经来过我的世界吗? 如果有, 为什么我会让你离开我. 如果没有, 为什么我的心会那么痛?
Basketball or soccer ? Damn . Which should i concentrate on ?
I won't forget
Everything you have said ,
Everything that we had done .
I'm still loving you as deep as ever .
